Kracken
Disclaimer:I don't own them and I don't make any money off of them.
Warning:Male/male sex, duosufferitus, angst,violence, language
The Cost
Speaking of You
"Well, tell me!" Duo shouted.
The doctor jumped and turned from the scans of Duo's bones. He fiddled with his glasses and then began to reply, "I want to be cautious about this-"
"Just say it!" Duo shouted again, ignoring Heero's grip on his shoulder. "I don't want to be coddled like a baby."
"Your bones are handling the grafts and infusions well," the doctor replied slowly. "There is a definite improvement in the damaged areas. There is not, however, as much improvement as I would like to see."
"Which means, in plain speak, that you're afraid of taking off a brace and having my body collapse," Duo retorted, hands working on the arms of his wheelchair. "You're afraid of bones snapping like twigs and having a huge lawsuit on your hands... and a killer ex gundam pilot boyfriend taking you out in revenge... am I getting warm here?"
The doctor swallowed audibly and then gave a tight nod. Duo turned his wheelchair abruptly. "Heero," he ordered. "Take all of the braces off. This is my decision."
Heero went very thoughtful, staring at the doctor, and then at the scans, and then he gave a tight nod as he bent to the task. When the braces were in a pile on the floor, Duo closed his eyes and gave a sigh of relief.
"Now," Duo ordered, "Scratch all of the places that have been itching since forever."
Heero chuckled as he gently scratched pink scars and the welts from the braces.
"I'm not going to jump up and run a marathon, "Duo promised the doctor, "but nothing is going to get better if I'm relying on braces to do the work of my muscles.
"How are you feeling?" Heero wanted to know as Duo made pleased sounds.
"Like I've been set free," Duo replied, but then he looked at Heero and added truthfully, "The left hip hurts pretty bad. That hip joint hasn't been allowed any play."
"It should improve," the doctor jumped in, re-asserting himself. "but if you feel a tearing, you should call me at once. There is still a real possibility that you might suffer clots and hemorrhaging."
"Yeah, the usual," Duo grumbled. He turned his chair towards the door of the doctor's office, giving the doctor an absent wave. "Later. Let's get out of here, Heero."
As they made their way out of the doctor's office and towards their van, Heero asked softly, "The pain is bad, isn't it?" He began pushing Duo, not waiting for the answer, but Duo didn't protest, simply sat hunched in his chair.
"Everything, aches," Duo replied. "It'll get better."
Heero nodded, though Duo couldn't see it, but then he said, "This is about leading those agents, isn't it?"
Duo tensed, but then he nodded. "Yeah, guilty as charged, but, you know, it was time, Heero, and you know it. That doctor would have kept me strapped for the rest of my life. He was too chicken to make the decision."
Everything could go so terribly wrong, Duo thought, as he tried to ride through the pain. Bones could shift, break, come out of sockets, or simply crumble under the pressure of his own weight. He joked, and acted tough, but they both knew that he had made a very dangerous decision.
"Those agents deserve as good as they can get," Duo said as Heero began getting him into the van, "and I deserve it too," he amended. "I went into this doing what they all told me I couldn't... ever. Time to take that chance again, to believe that I can do this."
Heero was very quiet as he strapped Duo in. Duo grew worried until Heero smiled, saying, "I know better than to argue." Heero chuckled and Duo laughed.
"Feels good," Duo murmured as Heero rubbed sore muscles. He didn't
have the talent, really, but he could be firm and gentle when it was called
for and Duo needed the touch more than any relief it gave his overworked body.
Stretched out on the bed, naked and feeling better and better, Duo smiled lazily at Heero. "You know what I want right now?"
Heero gave him an amused look. "I can imagine."
"Been awhile," Duo complained, trying not to sound so needy.
"You've been in pain," Heero reminded him. "It didn't seem the smart thing to do."
"Guess not." Duo ran a hand up Heero's arm, fingers walking along skin. He tugged at Heero's shirt sleeve when he reached it. "I feel good right now."
"Endorphines," Heero replied. "You just had a complete workout with your therapist. You're not feeling the pain yet."
Duo went quiet, his eyes pinched, remembering all too well how his sessions had used to end. His hand tightened on Heero's shirt. "I get it," he said softly and then let Heero go, eyes turning toward the wall. Who would want sex with those memories so prominent in both of their minds?
"Don't be stupid," Heero growled, guessing at Duo's thoughts and leaning down to be close to Duo's face. "I just don't want to hurt you."
"Maybe I need a little hurting?" Duo said, facing him again. "Maybe it's worth it?"
"Not to me," Heero replied harshly and then sighed when he saw Duo's hurt expression. "No, not like that. I meant, nothing is worth hurting you for. I can't do it."
"Oh," Duo said in a small voice and then gave Heero a sexy grin. "What if I didn't let you hurt me? What if I promised to say stop..."
"You wouldn't," Heero knew and traced a thumb along the scars on Duo's face. They were almost all gone now, removed by skin treatments and operations. His handsome features were becoming clear again, though the slight bend to his nose would always be there now.
Duo said in frustration, "Okay, so we still don't take the ride, but we can still play around, right?"
Heero smiled. "I thought we were."
Duo smirked,"Oh, you were leading up to something and I ruined it?"
"Ruined it? Not yet," Heero replied as he began to rub along Duo's body again.
It was hard to battle against the weariness caused by the therapy, but the interest was there. Duo groaned as Heero's hands moved to more personal spaces and clothing was suddenly being taken off.
"Yeah," Duo urged as Heero's lips wrapped around his erection. Hot, moist, tight. It was mind blowing enough even without the added bonus of having the man he loved doing it. It wasn't hard to convince Heero to let him return the pleasure. Heero kept it slow and easy, but it didn't steal the power of the orgasm that he wrung out of Duo at the end. Duo repaid him by sucking him down to the last drop, heedless of anything, but giving Heero his best.
Stretched out together and catching their breath afterward, Heero suddenly turned to Duo, captured his face in his hands and said with complete conviction. "I love you, Duo, more than anything in this world."
Duo trembled under the assault of those words. "I don't know how you can feel that way about me."
Hero kissed him, almost rolling over onto Duo to deepen it, but mindful not to hurt him. They mingled the taste of their bodies on their tongues, both of them trembling now.
"Love you, too," Duo breathed and then sucked on Heero's tongue.
Heero groaned, the sound seeming to vibrate through them both, and then he was gathering Duo, carefully, close to him, nuzzling into the curve of Duo's neck as Duo tried to kiss what he could reach of Heero's face.
"I almost lost this," Heero breathed. "I almost lost you. Don't ask me how I can love you. Don't doubt that I do."
Duo reached and comforted Heero, feeling that the man was strung out on a strong emotion, one that he was beginning to feel himself. His emotion of happiness, of 'being that damned lucky', was wrapped with pain, though, and bitterness. Why did he have to lose so much to get something as important as Heero?
Duo's body wanted to drag him down into sleep, but Duo denied it. Instead, he let his hands wander over his lover until he stirred the fire again and made them both forget the dark bedfellow who lay at the heart of their happiness.
"So?" Wu Fei asked, looking from Duo to Heero with a black eyebrow arched.
Duo opened his hand and showed Wu Fei the star patches that were to go onto the sleeves of his Preventer uniforms.
Wu Fei glowed, hands clapping together in relief. "Oh, my friend, I am so glad for you!"
"It came with a lot of restrictions," Heero tempered, "but Une had to admit that Duo was capable of carrying out his duties in this situation."
Duo put a patch on one arm and admired it. "I still have to do some mission scenarios that need a hundred percent success rates, but I'm not worried. My people are the best and they know what's at stake here. They want their group to stay intact and they need me to do that."
"We should celebrate," Heero suggested.
Wu Fei nodded. "We should call everyone to attend."
Duo looked reserved. He put his patches into his lap and wheeled to the window of Wu Fei's office to look out at the training field. "I don't want to jinx it..."
Wu Fei cocked his head knowingly and moved to stand beside Duo. "You're afraid of failing," he said softly. "You don't want everyone to know it when you do."
Duo shrugged. "Well, it's a hell of a lot bigger fall when you have a bunch of people rooting for you. This way, I can just slink away."
"No," Heero argued and joined them at the window. "If you don't believe in yourself, they won't either."
Duo rubbed the back of his neck and then made an exasperated sound, "All right! Whatever. Let's party, I guess."
Wu Fei smiled and Heero nodded. "Something large," Wu Fei said at the same time that Heero said, "Something small." They looked at each other, confused. Duo laughed at them as he wheeled away from the window.
"Heero's doesn't want me to wear myself out and Wu Fei wants everyone to know I'm doing okay," Duo snickered.
"You should be honored for your success," Wu Fei pointed out.
"But he shouldn't have to feel the need to tire himself hosting a large affair," Heero retorted.
"We are having a large affair," Duo reminded him, but it was a moment before Heero 'got it' and blushed.
Wu Fei pulled out his cell phone, as if it had all been decided. "A large party, then..."
"No," Duo told him firmly. "A middle sized party. That way, you can both be happy. Make sure there are beer and chips, too."Then he said under his breath, "Not that anyone will come."
Both Heero and Wu Fei froze in consternation and then Heero asked, "Why would you think that, Duo?"
Duo gave them a knowing look. "I am a cripple. People have been avoiding me because I make them sick when they look at me. I pretty much told a lot of people to fuck off, too. I don't see anybody coming to the party except the five of you, and even Trowa might make an excuse not to go."
"You're wrong," Wu Fei assured him. You weren't looking closely at people at the gun range, if you believe that."
"That was a pity party and you know it," Duo growled back. "I don't think I want an even bigger one."
Wu Fei leaned down, with both hands on the arms of Duo's wheelchair. "You're wrong, and I'm going to prove it to you."
TBC
On to Chapter twelve
Back to chapter ten