Part Ninety-four: Shopping
I parked the car as far from the mall itself as I could get; Heero might not be in love with his car, but he wouldn't be happy if I brought it back with dings. I patted its sleek dark hood and told it I would try to hurry, but it being this time of year, I couldn't make promises.
It's almost funny how some people will circle and circle like vultures, waiting for a space close to an entrance to open up. I wonder sometimes if that's a Human trait or just an impatient one. It seems to me it would be a lot faster to just park and get the shopping started, but what do I know? I tried asking when I lived with them, but I never really got a good explanation. And they don't all do it.
Heh. It's kind of fun now to watch Humans and all their little behaviors. I think when I was actually in their world I was too afraid to watch them that closely, for fear of attracting attention, but now... Well, what are they going to do to me now?
And here is another of their funny behaviors. Two adult females are unloading kids from a minivan. It seems like there are a dozen kids bouncing around the van, but it's probably only five or six; they just move so fast when they're small like that. The females are hauling out strollers, the huge, massive, tank-like kind, and snapping them into usable form to start loading the kids in.
It took me a while to understand that Human females -- women -- generally travel in pairs and groups when not working, and that they usually have their offspring with them wherever they go. I still don't quite understand the Human need to be constantly surrounded by others, but I suppose it's some residual herd instinct. Banshees are sociable, but we also value our personal space. Our females don't run in packs either; too competitive, some would say.
But then I suppose I do it now. I hardly ever go for coffee or to lunch alone; if Heero is out, someone else almost always goes with. Still being discreetly protective of me. I'd get mad, but there's really no point, and I can also now see myself as being just as protective of one of my friends in the same circumstances. Sometimes the whole office will go as a herd. It's funny to watch the faces of the dining hall staff when we all come thundering in; they can't seem to decide whether to just take cover or to actually run. I haven't figured out yet if they're really intimidated by us or just afraid Wufei is going to criticize the food again.
I was almost to the back end of the minivan when one of the kids, being chased by another kid, decided to make a left turn straight into traffic, nearly under the wheels of a -- fortunately -- slow-moving pick-up truck. I reached out and snatched him off his feet, swinging him around and setting him down again, almost before he realised he was airborne. He squawked and one of the women screamed. I remembered too late how touchy they are about strange males getting near their children. But instead of yelling at me, she went for the kid.
"Allen! How many times have I told you not to run around in the parking lot! You could get squashed!" She swept him up and made a few passes with her hands, and suddenly Allen was snapped into a harness, the other end of his leash being attached to the stroller containing two smaller kids.
She turned on me then. "Thank you so much for grabbing him! I tell him and tell him, but he doesn't remember when he gets excited."
I hesitated, then decided to go ahead. "Well, he's kind of small yet; might take a couple more years before he remembers. Maybe the harness should go on before he hits the pavement."
She glanced at her son, who was pouting and picking at the webbing of the harness, but otherwise behaving very nicely. "That's probably a good idea.... He doesn't like it, but I like the idea of squished kid even less," she smiled. "Thanks again."
I shrugged and returned the smile. "Anytime."
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I'm not really shopping for anything; it's more that I'm here just because I can be. The two Dragons have finally let me take the training wheels off -- witness Heero letting me use his car -- and start living normally, as in without one of them attached to my hip every moment I'm out of the Castle.
I even got to take a field assignment this week. Granted, Trowa and Inazuma were both with me, but I was still out of the office, which I haven't been since the... Incident. I didn't have any panic attacks or flashbacks and only startled twice. If either of my teammates noticed, they didn't say anything, so I felt pretty proud of myself.
Heero is involved in something down in the labs, but he's going to meet me for an early dinner and then we're going to go to a movie, probably something loud and mindless with lots of special effects. I love those sorts of movies; takes my mind off my own little special effects department.
I wandered through some of the stores, looked in a lot more windows, bought a soda and sat in the middle of the mall people watching. No panic attacks. No uneasiness that I could find. It's been a while, after all, and about damn time.
I really do feel like I've finally found 'me' again, amid all the craziness. I also think that talking to Julie helped. It doesn't make what she did forgivable, but it makes it understandable, in a weird sick way. If she had just told me what was happening, I would have done everything I could to help her, but she didn't and now I can't. Nothing I can do about it now. I have my own fears to deal with now, and I hope to hell I never deliberately hurt someone else just to save myself.
I wouldn't be here like this, though without the help of my Wyvern. What I wanted, what I did, made him uncomfortable and nervous, but he did it for me, because I asked. I knew, somehow, that it would work; that crossing that finally barrier would free me from that miserable loop of pain, guilt and fear, and it *has* worked. I still have my little triggers, but I'm not falling-apart-hysterical every time I turn around anymore. I feel... grounded; anchored again. I'm beginning to feel good again.
I bought a few little things for Dael. I'm sure she doesn't need them and I'm sure Teal will say I'm spoiling her, but I'm the uncle, so I'm allowed. I'd be over at the boarding house right now, but Teal and Dael are out 'visiting' for a couple of days.
Teal has friends all over the world from his wanderings; some of them in this area. They're spending the night with a Were that Teal has known since he was a pup. It's a bit of a coincidence; the Were raises sheep and sells their wool as spun yarn to specialty yarn shops all over the world. Teal promised to ask him for me if he ever takes special orders for certain finishes or colors. I have some ideas, but I've never found the right yarn.
The Were and his female have a daughter a few months older than Dael, so she should have fun.
I can hardly believe that Teal is willing to stay the whole summer, but I'll certainly take what I can get. He says he intends to continue wandering, between visits with me and his mother's Clan, until Dael is ready to attend school, then he'll find a suitable place to settle. I did mention that the Castle runs a day school for Magical children of the town and the surrounding area. He said he'd look into it when the time comes.
It's great to have him here, but it's even better that he isn't fussing over me. Those few moments in the office when he first arrived were the extent of my hysterical breakdown. Even hearing about my mother didn't knock me for as much of a loop as I really expected. I won't say it doesn't matter any more, because it does; just... not so much as it used to.
Other things in my life are beginning to straighten themselves out as well. I finally beat Inazuma on the range. He promptly decided that I was ready to move up a notch to a heavier bow, so I'm back where I was, shooting all over the place until I get used to it. And him smirking behind his hand where he thinks I don't see. I'll get him one of these days, and beat him with his own bow; see if I don't. And Teal brought Caz's bow for me.
He says he has a lot more things in storage for me, once I pull my head out and Choose Heero, so we can settle down in our own home. That kind of shocked me; I haven't been thinking about a home of our own. Never occurred to me that we could live somewhere together that isn't within the Castle walls. I know that Heero is waiting for me to respond to his declaration, and he says he'll wait as long as it takes, but Teal keeps giving me bad looks when Heero tells me he loves me and I don't say the same back to him. I'm just not... ready yet. I feel like I'm waiting for some kind of sign; fireworks, shooting stars, a UFO with "Do it now!" spelled out in flashing green lights. I think Heero knows that I'm not going anywhere, and I'm almost sure he isn't, so I don't see any rush. Teal's a romantic guy though; I guess he would feel better knowing that Heero and I are official.
The sorting out of my fear-induced explosions is also going well. I've been able to voluntarily call up the... well, power, several times now. The first time I was trying to pop a balloon and ended up breaking a window, but Madame Collier wasn't too upset. She's told me stories of some of the incredible things that the students do while trying to master some of the dueling spells, and believe me, breaking a window is pretty far down on the list. The second time was a little different. I made a pot of water burn.
I was working on controlling the explosive force and I essentially set the water on fire. We were both rather startled. I'm just glad to see some positive response from all the work I've done. Madame Collier feels that the more I play with it, the easier it'll become to control. I hope she's right, because I sure don't want to hurt anyone again.
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I was heading into a department store, thinking to look over some of the new styles to see if there was anything I could adapt for myself, when I was almost run down by a guy carrying a small child. We kind of bounced off each other in the over-crowded entrance between some tables filled with sweaters. I looked up to mutter a "sorry", and realised that the guy had the kid tucked under his arm and his hand over the kid's mouth. The kid was squirming quite a lot.
I blinked. Looked up at the guy's face. He looked kind of red, like he was either mad or embarrassed.
"Temper tantrum," he said after a beat. "You know how they are at this age."
I stared at him. Yeah... Sure... I've seen some tantrums thrown by masters. Still...
We stared at each other for a few blinks.
In the depths of the store, a female voice rose in a scream.
"ALLEN?!"
My eyes dropped to the kid.
Shit.
It was the kid from the parking lot; the one I'd snatched from squishing.
And there hadn't been any adult male in that mix.
It must have shown on my face. The guy lunged forward suddenly, punched me hard in the chest and took off.
I stumbled into a table and nearly went down. It was a damn hard blow; if I'd been Human it might even have stopped my heart. As it was, it slowed me down by several seconds, long enough for me to see the woman from the parking lot standing in the middle of an aisle, screaming at the top of her lungs with the empty harness hanging from her fingers.
Fuck no!
Not right in front of me; no fuckin' way!
I gave chase.
The guy was appallingly fast, given that he was hanging onto a struggling three-year-old, but I was only seconds behind him and yelling at the top of my lungs for him to stop, for someone to stop him. Nobody did, though. People looked and stared and stopped moving to watch, but not one of them tried to grab him or even stand in his way. They even got *out* of his way, dammit!
He ducked out a set of doors to the parking lot and I howled in frustration. I couldn't afford to lose track of him, couldn't let him get away. I burst through the doors; I couldn't take my eyes off him, couldn't give him a chance to disappear into the crowded lot.
And I fell over a bloody damn *motherfucking* bench.
I went sprawling, face first onto the concrete. Staggered to my feet with the world reeling around me. I saw him, fleetingly, far down a row.
He was going to escape. He was going to succeed in kidnapping a child right under my goddamn nose. I stumbled after them, trying not to think of what could happen to the kid if that sonuvabitch got away from me.
An engine roared to life and a car rocketed backwards out of a parking space.
"*NO!*" I howled, terrified, and then remembered an instant too late what could happen when I got frightened.
I felt it, though; felt the sudden, sharp wrench within my body. The feeling that meant that whatever the hell it is that I'm doing, I'm doing it *now*.
NO!
He had the kid! I couldn't--! I didn't--!
Oh fuck; *NO!*
Couldn't think, couldn't *not* think about what I'd just done. I ran. Ignored the pain, the sparkly lights in my peripheral vision and the blood running down my face and just ran as fast as I could. There was some godawful noise in my ears; it wasn't until later that I realised that it was me, screaming like... a Banshee.
But the car wasn't moving. It took me a few horrifying seconds to process that and when I did, I thought my heart was going to stop.
No. No! Please...!
And I was at the car.
The kidnapper was still alive, still moving, trying to get the engine started, but it wasn't turning over. The kid was in the back seat, screaming.
I know I was out of my mind and maybe even on some plane outside of my body as well. Everything unfolded in front of me, as distant and detached as a bad television program.
I put my hands through the window, through the glass without even feeling it. Grabbed him around the neck and hauled, still screaming at him.
From some distance, someone was yelling at me; telling me to stop, telling me to let him go. But I wasn't going to let the sonuvabitch make off with a little kid right in front of me; I'd fucking kill him first!
"Hey! Hey; it's all right! You got him; the kid's okay!"
Something... Hands over mine... Prying at my fingers...
"C'mon, guy; let go. We've got him; you got him. Let go now."
Solid voice. Calm. Emphatic.
I blinked.
Looked down.
Saw my fingers twisted into the kidnapper's collar and hair.
Saw his goddamn face turning purple.
Saw blood and broken glass all over my hands and him.
Looked up.
A gold badge.
A tan shirt.
A gun.
"It's okay now," said that calm, emphatic voice. "Sheriff. We're here; we'll take him. He won't get away. You can let go now."
I sucked in a lungful of air and it sounded like a sob.
Forced my fingers to unclench.
Collapsed onto my ass on the asphalt with an oddly strangled noise.
I hadn't...
"Kid!" I gasped. "Is he okay?!"
"He's just fine," said the solid-voiced deputy. "Scared, but his mother's here, and he's okay. How about you?"
I fell backwards with a real sob this time.
I hadn't killed anyone.
Someone said something to me, but I was too far inside myself to understand. Then something was moving me, something fanning around me and I was lying on something not so hard.
And damned if I wasn't crying the same as I had right after... the Incident. My time sense deserted me. Any dignity I may have aspired to went with it.
Someone pressed a handkerchief into my hand and I blew my nose. An arm went around my waist and I was suddenly, reelingly vertical and headed toward an ambulance.
"No!" I croaked, trying to pull back. "No doctors!"
"Man, you're bleeding like a stuck pig! Let them take a look at you."
I took a deep breath and managed to come to clarity long enough to produce my cellphone from my otherspace, and hit Heero's number on the speed dial. I pushed the phone at the person holding me, a different Sheriff's deputy.
"Boyfriend," I rasped. "Tell him." I wasn't having much luck with coherency. I heard Heero's voice from the speaker.
"Duo?"
"Um..." hummed the deputy with me. "No... I'm passing on a message..."
"WHERE'S DUO?!"
The guy jumped, but continued. "There's been some trouble at the mall..."
A sound very much like a roar came through the speaker.
I leaned into the phone. "Heero. Come now."
"Um... What he said," said the helpful and regretting it deputy. "West side; near Sears." The phone went dead. The deputy looked down at me. "What was *that*?" he asked reluctantly.
"Boyfriend," I repeated. My knees buckled and we almost went down together. To my embarrassment, the deputy scooped me up in his arms and carried me to the ambulance, where a paramedic began taking my temperature, my blood pressure and poking around me to find where all the blood was coming from and incidentally to get the glass off of and out of me.
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They made me lie down when I almost went face-first off the bench. The deputy stood near the door, pad and pen in hand, making notes as he asked for my version of what happened.
It's only been about a month since I had to give them my formal statement on the Incident, so I remembered not to offer opinions, but to just give him the facts as I saw them. The paramedic insisted on unbuttoning my shirt to check where the guy had punched me. The area right over my heart was already bluish-purple with green edges. The deputy produced a pocket camera and took several pictures of that as well as some of my face, my knees and my hands. When I stopped to think about what hurt, I concluded that I was a mess. I was also exhausted.
Using the power apparently sucks my energy reserves right down, according to how much power I call up. I did something big; I could certainly feel it, but the little kid was fine, the kidnapper was somewhat damaged, thanks to me grabbing onto him, but he sure wasn't dead, so I couldn't figure out where it went. Nothing had blown up, melted down or vanished. That bothered me almost as much as the whole kidnapping thing. I'd sent the power out; where the hell did it go?
Then the paramedic was swabbing my arm and reaching for a syringe. I jerked away with a rather girly shriek; had quite enough of Human drugs, thank you. He started to say something when someone outside screamed and then there was a familiar roar.
Heero must have landed.
The deputy standing on the bumper of the ambulance flattened himself against the side and I could see his wide, shocked eyes. An instant later Heero was there, looking so murderous I had to yell "I'm okay!" before he took a notion that the paramedic was hurting me.
My Wyvern blinked and some of the hellfire went out of his eyes.
"Duo..." he breathed instead, and then I was in his arms and I finally felt secure.
"I'm sorry..." I mumbled against his shoulder. "Some date."
"Stop that," he growled. "Tell me what happened. The parking lot is filled with sheriff's cars; there's a helicopter overhead and two TV trucks are setting up."
I pulled back to gape at him. "Oh, you have *got* to be kidding!"
"He's not kidding," said the deputy as he peered over the ambulance door. "Geez, what a mess."
"I'm taking you home," Heero declared.
"Heero..."
"I'm sorry," said the deputy, once more back with us professionally. "I need to finish getting his statement."
Heero growled.
I felt better just having him here. "Just let me finish. I just want to get it over with and go take care of..." I motioned to my 'war wounds'.
He gave me a look and a snort and flipped his phone open. "Jezebel? Heero. I need you at my location immediately. Yes, it's Duo." He closed the phone and I stared at him.
"'Jezebel'? Who the hell is Jezebel?"
"Mistress Loquinn. What? Did you think she didn't have a first name?"
Well, no; of course not. But 'Jezebel'? Good grief. I blinked at him. She appeared a minute later, her traveling bag of potions in hand. Behind me the paramedic made a sort of strangled sound. I looked back briefly.
"Like I said; no needles. You could kill me with some of that stuff."
He gulped, realizing I guess, just what he was dealing with here. "Sorry. Good thing you stopped me."
Yeah; good thing I kept Heero from committing murder.
'Jezebel' made short work of my injuries with a couple of potions and a salve. Even my energy levels seemed to be recovering. Things didn't look nearly so washed out or ripple-y.
I finished my statement, then went over it again, just to make sure I hadn't forgotten anything. Heero and Mistress Loquinn (I cannot imagine calling her 'Jezebel' to her face) listened with rapt attention. The deputy checked everything over, made sure of my name and address -- helped by Heero passing him one of my cards -- and then left to pass his information along to whoever was in charge. He asked me to wait around for a little bit, in case the investigating officer had any immediate questions. The paramedic -- whose name was Parnell -- let us sit in his ambulance for as long as we needed to. His partner was at another unit assisting in the treatment of the kidnapper. I muttered under my breath that it was too damn bad they had to treat the bastard.
When Parnell moved to stand outside to watch the developing circus, I was able to share my one confusion with Heero and Mistress Loquinn.
"I felt it, Heero; I know I did. It's not something you can mistake," I said firmly when he looked like he might try to argue with me.
"Could it have dissipated into the ether when you realised what you'd done?" asked Mistress Loquinn.
"It doesn't work that way. Once it's loose, it can't dissipate; it has to go somewhere. Has to land on something," I insisted.
"Maybe it blew up a tree further away," Heero suggested. "You may not have noticed; your attention was all on the vehicle."
I didn't bother to argue with him. I've been 'playing' with this for over a month now; I've got a pretty good idea of what it does, I just haven't gotten it totally under my control. The power does not dissipate; it always, *always* goes *somewhere*. The levels of my directed attempts have been low; enough to break a window, boil water, shred paper, blow out a flame, little things like that, but it's been consistent in that once called forth, it always does *something*. It *never* just vanishes.
And it was driving me crazy not knowing where the hell it had gone! I didn't want to find out, days from now, that I'd taken the roof off a house or murdered someone's dog by mistake.
"Well, wherever it landed, it wasn't to the detriment of anyone here," Heero said firmly. "We are going home. Where did you park the car?"
I took it as a good sign that he felt able to leave me for the few minutes it would take for him to collect the car. Heero's protectiveness is very warming and something within me always goes "awwww!" whenever he does it, but realistically speaking, I'm a grown Banshee and I shouldn't need a keeper.
The operative word there, of course, is "shouldn't."
"On the other side, by Robinson's; on the perimeter." Away from any chance dings or scrapes.
He nodded and looked at Mistress Loquinn. "Would you stay with him till I get back?"
I rolled my eyes; Mistress Loquinn snorted. "Of course, Heero." He stepped out of the ambulance, changed to his flying form and launched, to an accompaniment of shouts and screams that we ignored. Heero doesn't go around town in his Dragon form very often, but he doesn't have a problem with people knowing what he is.
Mistress Loquinn had already taken care of my scrapes and bruises with the deputy and the paramedic as witnesses to the fact that she had done so. It would have looked weird otherwise; those photos of me looking like hamburger and then no visible wounds at all an hour later.
"Duo," said Mistress Loquinn softly, "How did you know the guy was up to no good?"
I hadn't mentioned seeing the kid earlier in the parking lot; didn't think it was relevant to the crime, but I told her about it.
"So, I probably wouldn't have thought twice; just an exasperated father removing a tantrum-y kid. But he looked... wrong... And then I heard the woman screaming the kid's name, and it just... I don't know. It was just all wrong. And he must have seen my expression change, because that's when he punched me and took off."
"And where was he when you... um..."
"Threw the power?" I don't know what to call it any more than she does. I don't really throw it; it just *goes*, but I guess throwing is as good a concept as any for now. "He was in the car. He'd gotten to it and was backing out when I got up from falling over the damn bench. That must have been when I got scared enough for it to... to... go off, I guess." I rubbed my upper arms; my jacket was lying on the gurney behind me and it wasn't all that warm out for early spring.
She regarded the parking lot thoughtfully. "Your power went off, but never landed anywhere. Why didn't he just take off if he was already in the car? How were you able to catch him?"
I shrugged. Under the considerable volume of noise outside, I could hear the low, muscular purr of Heero's disgustingly powerful car.
"I guess he killed the engine; he was trying to get the car started again when I punched in the window and tried to strangle him." Still wish I had; goddamn pervert.
Mistress Loquinn looked at me, smirking, one eyebrow arched in amusement. "He killed the engine, or you did?" she said.
I stared at her. "No way..."
She suddenly grinned and grabbed my hand. "Come on, Banshee; let's go see!"
Before I could protest, or even thoroughly process what she was saying, she was towing me across the lot toward where the sheriff's deputies were examining the pervert's car. A moment later Heero was beside me as well.
"What are you doing?" he demanded.
"Ask her! I'm just along for the ride."
"Mistress?"
"Heero!" she laughed. "The engine died! Now, I ask you -- what are the odds?"
He stared at the car. "You're kidding."
"Hah! Five sickles says that engine is really most sincerely dead!"
Heero frowned at me. I shrugged. "No bet; not where Banshee magic is concerned," he muttered.
When we reached the vehicle, Heero flashed his ID and explained that all we wanted was to see the engine of the getaway vehicle. Since they couldn't find a reason why we shouldn't see it, someone dutifully popped the latch and raised the hood.
We all peered into the engine compartment where sat a large block of metal. Not, mind you, an expected internal combustion engine block, but a melted-solid block of steel, aluminum and cast iron. We stared at it for several seconds, and then Mistress Loquinn began to laugh.
"Duo! You wanted to stop him getting away and you did! The power knew exactly what you wanted and did it!"
I just stood there. "Wow..." I said finally. "Damn." Heero wrapped his arms around my shoulders.
"My Banshee," he whispered. "Wow indeed."
And I started to laugh.