Part 61
The morning following Wufei's unfortunate confrontation with the Wood Sprite dawned sunny and bright. Heero and Duo breakfasted together; all recriminations derived from the "boat ride" forgotten. Trowa, who looked rather weary, but smiled brightly at their greetings, joined them.
Wufei, he revealed, had snuck into the office early, in hopes of avoiding just about everyone. His ears were still magnificent and his bray was enough to wake the dead, Trowa continued with a snicker.
The three Magical Creatures shared a few smirks and a few minutes of giggles before finishing their food and heading off to work. Heero lagged behind for a moment to speak to the kitchen manager. When he caught up to his friends, he carried a box of chocolate donuts.
"For the jackass," he explained with a smile.
"Ah," smirked Trowa.
"Ah!" laughed Duo.
"I got enough for all of us," Heero continued. "It's a 48-hour spell, so we'll just have to endure."
"Oh," said Trowa. "Does Wufei know?"
"No," Heero replied briefly.
"Are we going to tell him?" queried Duo.
Heero grinned, showing his incisors and looking quite wicked. "No, we are not."
Trowa shook his head in admiration. "You are an evil creature, Heero."
"But that's why we love you!" giggled Duo.
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Heero entered Q's outer office at two minutes before nine.
"Heero! How nice to see you!" exclaimed Raia. She came around her desk to give him a hug. "You look very handsome this morning," she observed, looking him up and down. "Is this an occasion?"
"Must I have an occasion to dazzle a lovely Witch?" he replied with a grin.
Q's doorwarden laughed. "It's true what the Mundanes say, all the good ones are gay or taken. Let me buzz him for you."
A moment later she said, "He's waiting, Heero; go right in. Oh, notice his tan! He's very taken with it."
Q was indeed quite bronze, Heero noted. A week spent in the relentless sun of the Middle East would do that.
"You look," Heero smirked, "Like a California beach boy."
Q grinned back at him. "And you look like the Wyvern who swallowed the canary!"
They embraced warmly, then Q motioned Heero to sit.
"I understand that Chang Wufei has once again distinguished himself. Why do things always happen when I am not here?"
Heero laughed. "Maybe the good spirits follow you home?"
Q shook his head ruefully. "I would trade one of my sisters to have seen that performance," he sighed with a grin. "Does he still have them?"
No need to specify which "them" he was referring to.
"Oh yes; very much. If anything they look even longer today."
"I think I need to visit the office." Q tilted his chair back to prop his feet on his desk. "Do you think another anger management course would help?"
Heero shook his head with a snort. "Obviously, the last one didn't take. I doubt another one would. Spending two days braying like a mule might serve to curb that temper, though."
"Oh, is it only two days?"
"Yes. I managed to get hold of Jannell last night and she said it was a 48-hour curse. She also apologised for letting him get to her like that. I told her to forget the whole thing; he knows better than to criticize the food."
"Always entertaining; that's our Wufei," smiled Q. "Now that the lighter side of life has been dealt with, I am afraid we must turn to more serious matters."
Heero's eyes widened. "What's wrong? And how may I help?"
"Oh, dear... I wish you hadn't said that so eagerly, Heero. Now I'm going to feel guilty."
"Oh?"
The blond Wizard tilted his chair even further back, looking up at the ceiling. "You recall the... incident in the R&D section."
Not a question, but Heero answered as if it were. "With crystal clarity, I'm afraid."
Q nodded, still not looking at him. "They finally located the last intern; he was slumped over a bar in Kuala Lumpur, with no memory of who he is, what happened or how he got there. But he's fine, physically."
"Why do I not like where this is headed?" Heero asked with a frown.
Q sighed heavily. "I know, Heero, but I'm afraid it's necessary if we're to avoid a repeat."
"Damn," said Heero softly. "Only one day a week then."
"Four days."
"A day and a half."
"Two mornings and an afternoon?"
"All right," Heero growled. "Do I answer to them or to you?"
"Oh, to me, of course. You don't think I'd trust them after what happened, do you?"
"Just checking." Heero got to his feet. "Flexible scheduling."
"Of course, Heero. I would prefer they don't know when to expect you, actually. It'll keep them on their toes."
Heero shot his superior a feral grin. "Or I will."
Q looked up at him then. "Just... Don't kill anyone, Heero; all right."
"I'll do my best."
"Thank you, Heero. I appreciate this very much."
"You're welcome, Q. We'll talk about my bonus later," he grinned.
He turned toward the door, only to be arrested by a long sigh from behind him. Heero paused, debating whether to turn or not. He knew better. He'd already agreed to one damage-control assignment, did he really want to risk another?
Unfortunately, his upbringing betrayed him; he had to acknowledge Q's sigh.
"Is there something else?" he asked warily.
Q smiled brightly; that alone made Heero frown.
"Now that you mention it... There is something you could help me out with, Heero. In fact, I do believe you're the only one qualified to help."
::Run Heero; run!:: shrieked a voice from inside his head.
~sigh~
"What can I help with?" he inquired reluctantly.
::I'll regret this, I know I will...::
Q sat forward, hands folded neatly on top of his desk, fairly radiating charm and persuasion. "The MRO has requested assistance in the area of negotiations. They've asked specifically for you. You made a wonderful impression the last time you assisted."
::Aw, fuck...::
"Q, you know I hate that; isn't there anyone else you can send?" He ran his fingers through his dark hair in agitation. Damn! He hated working in MRO! Not because he hated Mundanes; he actually got along quite well with most non-Magical Humans, but because it involved dealing with so many stupid Humans. Heero had a very low tolerance for stupidity in any form; he still could not understand why so many political and social leaders of Humans were such fools. And the travel load, all that teleporting, just played havoc with his bioclock.
Q shook his blond head apologetically. "I did inquire of Euro and Asia, but they have no one to spare. And Africa asked if they could borrow you."
Heero glared indignantly. "What about all those times we assisted them?" he demanded.
Q could only sigh. "Apparently, everyone is woefully short on shape-shifters just now. I really do hate to ask, Heero, but... well, we're just stuck right now. And agreements are expiring."
Heero leaned on Q's desk, head hanging in resignation. "Duo and I are just beginning to get close, Q. I really... The timing..." His voice faltered into silence.
Q came around the desk to pat Heero's shoulder. "You would be working with Letitia and St John (1) and possibly Verlaine. Verlaine has already said that they are more than willing to arrange the trips to accomplish the most in the least time." He rubbed at Heero's back, between his shoulderblades and coaxed a faint groan.
"You play rough, Q; you know that?" Heero straightened and turned. "Okay; you've got yourself a hitman. I'll give them blocks of 48 hours at a time; it's up to them to schedule to their best advantage. And I want my weekends free." He glared at Q, but the blond was used to Heero's glares and unaffected by them. "I've Chosen him, Q; I'm only waiting on his response."
Q blinked. "Oh, my. I didn't realise you'd gone so far, Heero. I am sorry to take you away, but this is what happens when you're the go-to guy." He flicked his fingers, conjuring up a bouquet of lavender roses and a large box of chocolate truffles. "Give these to Duo, from me, and tell him I will try to make up for this somehow."
"Q..."
"No, Heero. I have a job to do, and sometimes I have to interfere with the plans of others, but I'm not insensitive," he smiled.
Heero shook his head, chuckling darkly. "Oh, I don't know; sending a poor Wyvern out among the scary Humans is pretty mean, Q."
Q put the flowers and the box of candy into Heero's hands. "Oh, I think you can handle it; I have every confidence in your abilities."
"Remember that when I have one of them for lunch."
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"I don't get it, Heero. Don't they have people in R&D?" asked Duo.
"At the moment there are five Wizards in the R&D lab. Normally, they would be training five interns, but there was a... problem a few months ago. Q feels that the lab needs to be restructured."
"You think?" muttered Trowa without looking up from his notes. Heero cast him a narrow glance, but didn't reply.
"And Q thinks you're the one to do it?" said Duo.
"I did it before when I was an intern in R&D. Supposedly, they didn't need to be baby-sat anymore, but there have been some lapses." He sighed and set the vase of water on Duo's desk and stuck the roses in it.
Duo had his nose in the candy box. "Okay, so you're going to babysit some Wizards for a few hours a few times a week. That doesn't explain why Q sent me flowers and candy." He looked up at Heero's silence. "Heero?"
Inazuma slipped into the office and made straight for Duo's desk, obviously bursting with purpose.
"Heero! It's all over the lounge! Are you really going to work in MRO?"
Heero's hand went to his eyes. He sighed heavily and counted to ten, then twenty. "I was just about to tell Duo, Inazuma," he muttered tersely.
The young Elf looked at Heero, then at Duo. "Um... Oops?"
Heero looked up and smiled, showing his teeth. "Yes. I see there is work in your in-box."
"Yes, sir!" He scurried away, head down, just in case.
"MRO?" said Duo sharply. "What's MRO?"
"'Mundane Relations Office'," Heero sighed. "They handle the agreements and arrangements between Humans and Magical Creatures. They write the contracts and do the negotiations with Human governments, organisations, groups and individuals. I'm to be the - the enforcer."
Duo sat up straight, purple eyes wide. "Say what?! You mean like a killer?"
"No!" Heero spluttered. "Not like that!"
"Think about it, Duo," said Trowa from his desk. "If you were Human, and you wanted to argue about the tiny little details of something already agreed to, just to impress someone or make yourself look more powerful, would you want to mess with that?"
Heero shifted to his Wyvern form, wings raised and looking heart-stoppingly menacing. He even growled.
Duo gasped, then began to giggle. "Okay, I get it!" he laughed.
Next to Trowa, Wufei rapped on the desk to get their attention. He held up his notebook computer for them to read.
"And do we get any extra help for when you're off enjoying yourself?"
Trowa threw an eraser at him. "I think we can struggle along without Heero once in a while. You're just cranky!"
Wufei glared and turned the screen to Trowa.
"You'd be cranky too, if that rotten Sprite had turned you into a jackass!"
Trowa raised one eyebrow. "Wufei, we were there, remember? You made a jackass of yourself." Wufei opened his mouth and brayed angrily. "Never mind, Burro," Trowa laughed. "Or I'll come and rub your ears." Wufei glared, but subsided.
Heero shifted back to his usual form and sat on the corner of Duo's desk. "The flowers and candy are in apology for giving me a job that will take me away for a couple of days at a time." He touched Duo's cheek gently, lovingly. "I love you, Duo; I want to spend all my time with you."
Duo blushed, leaning into Heero's touch. "And I like spending time with you..." he murmured. "But this is a career step, isn't it? You're stepping in when Q needs you; that shows how much he values your talents."
Heero snorted. "You are entirely too understanding, Banshee."
Duo laughed and laced his fingers together behind Heero's head to pull him down and into a kiss. "You just wait; I'll get you lulled into a false sense of security, then I'll turn into a real screaming Banshee."
"Sure you will," Heero breathed. "Kiss me again? I want to stock up..."
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"Q! What brings you here?" cried Duo. He closed the file drawer and bounced over to meet his boss, enveloping the slim blond in a bear hug.
"Well, I could say 'to get one of your hugs' but that would be a lie," Q smiled. "Although I certainly won't turn it down!"
Duo laughed and hugged him again. "Too late! You've already been hugged!"
"Actually, I came to have a word with Wufei," Q admitted with a smirk.
On the other side of the room, several heads returned quickly to attending to their work. Trowa made a strange noise. It might have been a giggle.
Wufei looked up and blanched. His hand came up, as if to hide his ears, then dropped again as he realised the futility. He sighed heavily and prepared himself for the inevitable.
"Good afternoon, Wufei," said Q easily, perching on the edge of Wufei's desk where he could read the text displayed on Wufei's notebook.
"Good afternoon, Q. How was your visit to your home?"
"Insane, as usual. I don't know why they insist on my being there; I know nothing and care less about weddings. But I did get in some sailing and horseback riding."
"That sounds relaxing."
"It was. I see that you have had an interesting week, as well, and it's only Tuesday."
Wufei swallowed, trying not to open his mouth. He knew what would come out if he did.
"Yes, sir."
Q smiled. "I have to ask, Wufei; the compulsion is irresistible. May I touch your ears?"
Wufei's chin quivered. He bit his tongue with a resigned sigh. What else could he expect, after dishonoring himself so completely? He nodded faintly.
"Thank you, Wufei," murmured Q as he brushed his fingers over the long furry ears. "My, they are fuzzy, aren't they! They're quite impressive. But you'd rather they were gone, yes?"
Wufei nodded, not looking at the blond. To be quite honest, he didn't really mind having his ears rubbed. It felt... nice. But it was still an embarrassment.
"Perhaps you have been considering your next step?"
Wufei looked up curiously. Next step? The only thing he was considering was surgery.
"To restore harmony and balance and... honor to your life?"
Wufei stared. Oh no... Oh NO... He opened his mouth to protest, and a strangled squawk came out. He clapped a hand over his mouth. He would not make that noise in front of Q!
The blond Wizard regarded him fondly. "It would be the honorable thing to do, Wufei. A measure of the dignity of an Imperial Were-Dragon." He patted Wufei's shoulder and ran his fingers over one long ear. "Think about it, please."
"Yes sir..." read the message on Wufei's notebook. "I will do so."
Q beamed his approval. "Thank you, Wufei. I know I can count on you."
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The usual chattering conversation in the serving line of the dining hall fell to a bare murmur as Wufei walked into the room and headed straight for the head of the line.
The Chinese Were-Dragon no longer sported the incredible ears of the past two days.
People parted warily to allow him to step up to where Jannell regarded him narrowly.
"Mr Chang," she nodded politely.
"Miss Jannell," he replied in kind. "I wish to tender my sincerest apologies for my abysmal behavior of the other day. I am sorry to have caused you distress; it will never happen again."
A low hiss ran through the line.
Jannell inclined her head gracefully. "I accept your apology, Mr Chang. I am sure it was the result of stress and not due to any malice on your part."
"Thank you, Miss Jannell. I am grateful for your generosity." Wufei bowed deeply.
"Think nothing of it, Mr Chang." She inclined her head once again.
Wufei stepped away from the counter and retreated to the end of the line where Trowa, Duo and Heero awaited. Wufei looked remarkably relaxed for having just abased himself before an audience.
"Wufei, that was... just amazing!" whispered Duo. "You didn't even flinch!"
Wufei snorted, but didn't reply.
Trowa patted his shoulder. "I'm proud of you; you did that very well."
Heero arched one eyebrow. "Graciously done, Chang. Your ancestors are pleased."
Wufei muttered something under his breath.
"I beg your pardon?" said Heero in a tone of voice that suggested he had heard exactly what was said, but was giving the Were-Dragon a chance to reconsider.
"Nothing, Heero. I was just considering what to have for lunch. The fish looks good, don't you think?"
Heero glared mildly. "Yes, it does."
"And I'm sure the rice is perfect."
"I'm sure it is."
"Wufei." Duo offered a bowl of rice. "Here; so that you don't have to ask today."
Wufei's carefully neutral expression faded slightly. "Thank you, Duo," he said warmly. "You're a good friend."
"Anytime, Fei," Duo grinned, and turned back to consider his own lunch.
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"Heero! What a surprise!" cried the odd-looking Wizard. "It's been ages since we've seen you!"
"Indeed it has!" exclaimed a second, even odder-looking Wizard.
"What brings you down here?" asked a third.
"He's a spy for Q, that's why he's here!" grumbled a fourth.
"Oh, now, Heero would never spy on us, would you Heero?" proclaimed a fifth.
Heero looked at the five Wizards. He snorted derisively. "They finally found the last intern." The five Wizards tensed as one. "Alive." The five Wizards relaxed. "No thanks to you five."
Heero strode around the lab table and into the center of the room, where he turned to address his former mentors.
"I am now your baby-sitter," he announced briskly. "I answer only to Q. I want to see notes, logs, supply manifests and whatever misbegotten experiments you are currently working on." He glared at each of the Wizards in turn. They all sported rather guilty expressions and shuffled their feet in the manner of schoolboys brought before a headmaster. "Now, please!" he snapped.
The Wizards scrambled to gather the ordered items, almost falling over each other in the process.
"You said there wouldn't be any repercussions!" hissed one.
"Excuse me! I wasn't the one who added the wormswort!"
"He told me wormswort, that's what I added!"
"I said snakewort, you boob!"
"Just shut up! It's your fault for not warning us!"
"I said 'fire in the hole!' didn't I?"
"After it was too late!"
"Where's my notebook?"
"Probably right where you left it - six years ago!"
"At least I can remember what I did five minutes ago, you -"
"I hear a great deal of noise, but I see no notes, no manifests and no logs," growled Heero. "Less blame, more searching, gentlemen."
At least things - and Wufei - were back to normal in the Investigations office. This particular job would be an irritant only, unless of course, he did have to eat one of these fools. True, they had devised some of the most reliable, most useful and most powerful charms, potions and spells of the past century, but Ancestors above! The attrition rate of interns was horrendous. Heero suspected that he might have been the only one to come out of this section unscathed, and that only because of his lightning reflexes and sharp attention to everything around him.
Satisfied that the Wizards were no longer passing blame among themselves, Heero turned to the small brazier and its merrily burning fire. He tapped the bronze vessel and spoke the name of the one he wished to see, and a moment later Duo's image appeared.
"Heero! How cool! I didn't even know we had one of these things!"
"It's not much used in our office. Very few Mundanes are aware of them."
Duo considered, his purple eyes far away. "Yeah, that's true. So, how's it going?"
"I'm just getting started," he began. A movement in his peripheral vision demanded a sharp; "Not there, G! You'll blow the windows out!"
Duo blinked. "Heero? What's going on down there?" he demanded anxiously.
"Don't add anything to anything!" Heero snapped at the startled Wizards. To Duo he said; "Just heading off an accident. Come down when you finish? We'll go out."
Duo smiled, though he looked a bit uncertain. "Okay... Just make sure you're there..."
"I will be, baby. Love you." Heero 'tinked' his fingers against the brazier and the image faded.
"All right, you old goats; let me see what miserable records you've been keeping." Heero swung around to glare at the meager piles of paper they offered.
::Q, you are so going to pay for doing this to me!::
Ah! Heero brightened as an idea dawned. Perhaps Q's sisters would like to come for a visit...
On to Chapter sixty-three